24 February 2018

#24 - Fucking for the Fictional


After The Fairy Is Bored with Her Garden by Caroline Bird


The Hobbit’ never has a lot to say
about the sex lives of its denizens –
no word on how they spend a sweaty day
entwined amongst some elvish courtesans.
The same is true of much of fantasy,
we rarely learn about what happens next
when pixies, sprites and goblins meet in threes –
those little ins and outs of fictive sex.
So I intend to write a catholic tome
on how imaginary creatures fornicate –
of what goes on behind closed doors at home,
the ways they tempt and charm and masturbate.
A comprehensive guide that’s packed chock full
with tips on fucking for the fictional.


RJT



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